My ex-sister-in-law passed away on April 16. It was a total shock as she had a heart attack. Not even my kids knew their aunt wasn't doing well. She was always a lovely woman and her family really misses her.
My favorite cousin died on May 20. He had a stroke just before Thanksgiving last year and even with immediate medical care and therapies, he never made any progress back to the person he was before the stroke.
Also in May, I ended up in the hospital and was diagnosed with diverticulitis. The pain was right up there (9), and ever since then it has been a struggle to eat enough so I stop losing weight. This week I had a colonoscopy and endoscopy to see the extent of the diverticulitis and why I can't really eat. Well, I now need surgery to remove part of my colon because the diverticulitis is severe and the doctors are concerned about ulceration and bleeding. I don't want to end up with a colostomy, so I hope the doctor can actually put the two ends together to make me "whole" again. I'm concerned because the surgery will probably take place when I'm here alone. But I know God has it all figured out and the plans I need to make will be revealed in time.
That's the reason for the silence on my end. I have been feeling a bit like a pinball, slamming from one life-changing event to another, just focusing on getting through each day (sometimes hour) whole.
Next month we'll have a small memorial service with all my girls - they can finally travel (they are all "essential"), so I am looking forward to not being alone and getting to see them and my grandchildren. The isolation demanded by COVID has definitely made dealing with death and illness so very different.
